Pick Up Lines
by fluffybluff
Summary: Can a certain redhead pull off a series of cheesy pick up lines to impress Kamiya Kaoru?


Disclaimer: RK is not mine. It's Wat-tan's! :D

AN: My fic after a looong time. I can't continue my other fics yet, because I'm in my most hectic moments of my life. Graduation is coming in November and I have a bunch of thesis to write, seminars to attend and presentations to give, and that's why I've stopped touching ffnet since once I write/read I would never be able to stop :P I can't stand the stress anymore, so I created this fic just to help me relax. Anyways, the other TBC fics are still in my to-do list, so if any of you have read them and waiting for an update, it's coming. Sorry for the delay, but real life always come first, right? :D

This fic came to life after my friend told me that she met a guy who thought "Hey, did you fart? Coz you blew me away" is an appropriate, even charming pick up line… :P I was gonna incorporate that in the fic, but I really couldn't give any of RK guys that line because it's just too... I don't know. I need a word beyond gross and idiotic. Not even the characters as ridiculous as Sano and Cho can pull it off. Anyways, I hope you enjoy this rather short fic, don't forget to read and review!

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**Pick Up Lines**

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Classes, levels and superiority has always been an important part of life, whether it has to do with one's career, love life, gym, and even their choice of bar. There are shady bars with greasy fries and super sticky tables, student bars full of college students wasting their semester away, the happening bar, which, more often than not, has a sophisticated ambience, the place where people with good career go and hang out, and the exclusive clubs where the A-listers created their scandals. There's only one thing that these four bars have in common.

Kamiya Kaoru looked at the redhead trying to talk to the brunette sitting beside him, but after a couple of minutes, the brunette moved away. He sighed and chugged down his rum and coke dry before ordering another glass. Apparently he was a pretty good drinker; since Kaoru counted that it was his sixth glass he chugged down earlier. He spotted another girl and moved to sit beside her, only to be left alone again. The girl looked pretty pissed, and he looked even more desperate than before.

Kaoru sighed and took a sip from her drink; no matter what kind of bar you go to, there will always be the pathetic loser trying to pick up girls with cheesy/offensive/corny/overall just stupid pick up lines. Though, this is the first time she saw the super shameless one that kept on coming back after he got rejected, and after he obviously hit on other girls as well. There were only a number of girls in the bar during weekdays, and that guy had at least tried to hit on Kaoru twice. It was as if he was trying to do laps of hitting on girls or something.

The redhead then moved towards a table where there were three girls chatting. They talked for a little while, and just when Kaoru thought that he was going to score with one of them, the three girls stood up and poured drinks on him.

"Jerk!" they shouted in unison, and he left the table, sitting alone again on the bar stool.

Kaoru giggled unstoppably while drinking her beer. That guy's attitude just ruined him in general. He was good looking, he looked pretty fit and charming when he entered the bar. All the girls turned their head, including Kaoru, when he walked by. He was with his friends, all of them were the hunky type. If he wasn't so desperate, the redhead wouldn't have any problems to score with anyone he wanted to.

Kaoru looked at him again. He was still there, wiping his wet hair and face with a napkin. He then turned his head, and his gaze and Kaoru's gaze met. He then stood up and walked towards Kaoru.

"Oh crap." Kaoru murmured before gulping down her beer.

That guy was already all over her twice. Earlier tonight, she was sitting in the bar and minding her own business when the cute redhead suddenly sat beside her. She admitted, she was pretty excited, since she had been eyeing him ever since he entered the bar. He looked hot with an effortless after work looks; long sleeved shirt rolled up to the elbow which showed his seemingly muscular but lean posture nicely, high quality dark coloured dress pants that fits him well, simple belt, but in one glance Kaoru knew that it was from her favourite brand, and nice leather shoes. His long, red hair was tied in a low ponytail. He had a scar on his cheek, but despite that, he looked very groomed. No stubbles, and he smelled nice too.

Why did he have to open his mouth?

"Hi, can I take your picture? I want Santa to know exactly what I want for Christmas." He said with a weird smile.

Kaoru froze, still flabbergasted by the fact that those cheesy pick up lines came out from such a sophisticated, level headed and elegant looking man. The guy chugged his drink and then continued.

"So, are you from Tennessee? Because you're the only ten I see." He said again.

"Sir, I think you've had enough drink." Kaoru said. He shook his head and laughed weirdly.

"No, no. I'm not drunk, just intoxicated by you." He said, and Kaoru got up and moved to the faraway table in the corner.

He moved to another group of girls on a table, but soon left the table with menacing glares from the girls. He looked at Kaoru again, and then walked towards her and sat beside her even without Kaoru inviting him. Kaoru sighed.

"Miss, I forgot to ask you…" He bit his lips, and his face was tomato red, and then blurted out a sentence with a choked voice, "Want to come see my HARD DRIVE? I promise it isn't 3.5 inches and it ain't floppy."

Kaoru glared at him. "Are you serious? Leave before I punch you silly." She said grimly, and he left, stumbling upon the tables and chairs.

Since then, he had stopped talking to her for forty minutes. He went after other girls in the bar, and Kaoru's annoyance slowly changed into amusement. Watching him got turned down so many times was like watching a slapstick show for Kaoru.

"Miss?"

Hell no! Kaoru screamed in her head. That was the third time he found that guy in front of her. She was about to scold him, but stopped when she looked at her pathetic appearance. He was drenched with different kinds of coloured drinks and there was an olive sitting on his messy hair. He gulped his drink and then put the empty glass on Kaoru's table. He smiled, still with his weird smile.

"Hello again, Miss. I just want to say that when I look into your eyes, it is like a gateway into the world of which I want to be a part of." He said, his voice a sounded a little miserable despite the weird grin that he had on.

"Oh GOD!" Kaoru stood up, ready to leave, when her gaze fell upon the giggling group of men in the other corner of the room. They pretended that they weren't looking at Kaoru and the redhead, but apparently none of them were a good actor. Only then Kaoru had a realization.

"This is a dare, isn't it?" She asked.

"It's between me and my mom, and I need your help! My mom says that if I don't get a date by tomorrow, she's putting me up for adoption." He answered. Kaoru chuckled and let him sat beside her. He sat down, and in such a discreet movement, Kaoru took out a piece of paper and a pen.

_A bet?_ She wrote, and he signaled her yes while scratching his right ears, revealing a small Bluetooth device. Apparently, his friends who sat in the corner sofa could hear every conversation he had. Kaoru shook her head incredulously. These guys really went all-out for a stupid game.

_Big money?_ She wrote again, and he signaled yes again.

_How big?_ She wrote again, and this time he smiled. Not the weird creepy grin that made him looked like a douche, but the genuine smile that could melt any girl's heart.

"So, are you free tonight, or is 5,000 enough for you?" He asked her. She looked at Kenshin, and then laughed. She felt like some kind of spy who talked through a secret language or something. Moreover, that guy seriously owed his friends 5,000 for a ridiculous pick-up bet.

"I'm free tonight." Kaoru said with a smile. The redhead nodded and smiled.

"Well, great, I'm Himura Kenshin. Pleasure to meet you. So, do you have a name, or should I just call you 'mine'?" He asked. Kaoru grinned.

"I'm Kamiya Kaoru." She said while smiling meaningfully at Kenshin, and then leaned forward to his left shoulder.

"Finish them off…" She whispered, and Kenshin's smile became wider.

"So… Uh… Kaoru… I'm new to this area and you are the prettiest sight I've seen so far. Can you give me a tour of your body?" He asked, and Kaoru giggled.

"Do you have a car?" She asked. Kenshin nodded, and Kaoru continued. "I'll drive. Is my apartment okay?" She asked, and then they heard a really loud scream from the other corner of the bar. Kaoru took a glance at them and saw five guys howling and groaning sadly. One of the guy smashed a cellphone on the floor and walked towards the two.

"OI! Kenshin, you lucky bastard!" He shouted between mock anger and a surpressed grin. Kaoru shrugged and pulled Kenshin's arm.

"Come on." She said, and Kenshin grinned at his friend.

"See you tomorrow, Sano. Don't forget to tell the others to prepare the money too." He said while taking off his Bluetooth, and then disappeared behind the exit door.

**oOoOoOo**

Kenshin and Kaoru laughed hysterically as Kaoru drove away from the bar. Kaoru couldn't believe that she actually helped a stranger won a strange bet. It was pretty idiotic to bet a big amount of money for such a stupid bet like trying to pick up girls. Kaoru wiped her laughter tears.

"Ne, Kenshin, that's a lot of money to bet on, you know. I mean, 5,000? Come on. Bets among friend ranges from ten bucks to a hundred bucks. Not 5,000!" She said. Kenshin chuckled.

"Well, it's not actually 5,000. It's 15,000." He said, and Kaoru looked at him incredulously, she had already forgotten to pay attention to the street. "Street, Kaoru-san. Pay attention to the street." He added, and Kaoru turned her head back to the street.

"That's a lot of money for fun." She commented.

"Well, it's not really for fun, actually. It's for charity. I'm building an orphanage and I asked them to donate some money. They agreed to donate if I could pick up a girl using only cheesy pick up lines in the conversation." Kenshin explained.

"That's pretty evil." Kaoru said with a small chuckle, and he laughed.

"No, no. I guess they are both pissed at me and worried about me. You see, three years ago, I broke up with my fiance, and ever since then I drowned myself in my work and my studies. I was out with them only once every three to four months, and I was never really enthusiastic about it. They thought I was still mourning over the break up until now, so they arranged this little prank. I'm not the one night stand type, and they know that hooking up with strangers is not something I want to do, that's why they arranged a game like this to ensure that I have a laugh." He said.

"So, what's your oh-so-demanding job that you couldn't hang out with them?" She asked.

"Well, I'm originally a pediatrician, but I'm doing a research about children health care. What about you?"

"I'm a journalist for a women's magazine." She said. They both stayed quiet a little, until Kaoru chuckled again. "Your friends are right. You should go out, chat with some girls and, since you don't like one night stand, ask them to go on dates with you. I'm sure no one would reject a guy like you." She said.

"Well, I'm here with you, right?" He asked with a shrug.

"No, I mean a girl that you're really attracted to. Not someone you picked up because of a bet." She explained, and Kenshin sighed.

"I wouldn't come to your table and made your night a living hell if I'm not attracted to you. I was actually thinking about how to get your phone number." He said calmly, and Kaoru blushed.

"Well, I thought u just do these things to the people you're not attracted to, so that if you're rejected, you have nothing to lose." She replied.

"That's okay. From the way you talk to the bartender, I know you're a regular there. If you left tonight, I could just stay out of sight for two months, cut my hair and dye it black, and then go back to the bar and meet you again." Kenshin said easily, as if he was talking about how to make coffee.

Kaoru laughed. "You're crazy."

"You look like you're worth the hassle." He simply said, and Kaoru blushed again. This guy was good at making women's knees weak when he was not saying weird things like, "did it hurt when you fall out of heaven?" or "how was heaven when you left it?".

Soon, they stopped in front of Kaoru's place, and Kaoru took out a piece of paper. She jolted down something and then put it inside Kenshin's shirt pocket.

"Thanks for… Uh… Letting me use your car to send myself back home. See you, Kenshin. Make sure you're sober enough to drive back home." She said before closing the car door. Kenshin sat in the passenger seat quietly while watching Kaoru went inside the gate. He sighed heavily when her silhouette disappeared into the darkness. He took out the small piece of paper, opened it, and smiled. The phone number was written on the top part of the paper, and the rest was a poem.

_Afternoon at the bay_

_And a midnight slumber_

_Remember the day_

_I gave you my phone number_

_Call me, my knight in shining armor!_

_XXX_

_Kaoru_

_-PS: is this cheesy enough for you?_

Kenshin chuckled as he read the poem over and over again. It was cheesy, indeed. Even for him who just spent his night blurting out cheesy words to a lot of girls. No wonder she was a journalist. She could think up a poem and wrote it in godlike speed anytime she wanted. Kenshin took out his phone, dialed Kaoru's number, and sighed. Should he obey the three days rule and call her three days later? Or should he just call her now?

Kenshin chuckled at himself and shrugged. Who cares if he seemed desperate? She had seen him in the most humiliating state, there's nothing to lose anymore.

Inhaling deeply, he pressed the call button. Not long, she answered the phone. Kenshin exhaled.

"Hey, Kaoru? It's me, Kenshin."

=0o0=


End file.
